You know there is one Govt. post in this country that officially allows the office bearer to screw things up in every position mentioned in the great book of Kamasutra and get away with it. Now you must be wondering doesn’t all Govt. officials (Democratic or Khaki) have all the rights in God’s green earth to screw every inch of this country without any fear of accountibility? Historically speaking YES but this one is special, maybe because it has something to do with our sentiments and national pride *fart*
So make a wild guess about this Govt. position that allows Govt. officials to eff things up!
Is it Presidency?
Almost true, but as we speak our free media is making headlines and tons of money out of every Presidential screw up and there is Imran Khan moaning *Mid term, Mid term* in the back ground. So, in other words the screw up aint as hassle free as one desires.
Is it Interior Ministry?
Now, I know what you are thinking; the person holding this job position has a whole list of legendary screw ups under his belt. All he has to do is to wear a tie that matches his favorite sweet (mithaai). Wave at angry mob like he’s their favorite stage dancer and after every national tragedy that has something to do with his incompetence, he comes on the media and proclaims:
I knew this was going to happen! (Mujhay tau pehlay se he information thee )
Close but this guy is not our winner because even an interior minister in a country like ours has some, some sense of responsibility!
I know, I know whom am I kidding here. But wait till I announce the REAL fu**er and you all will helplessly agree with me.
And the winner is………. Chairmen PCB *tada*
As far as the history of Pak-Cricket goes, this office has mostly been occupied by relatives, golf buddies, in-laws and family friends of the Government of that time. Unlike any other job where “some” relevant experience or formal education is considered necessary. Chairmen PCB is usually selected on either of the following criteria:
- Plays golf with the President if the President plays golf (Naseem Ashraf)
- Plays poker with the President if the President plays poker (Naseem Ashraf)
- Wears Khaki wardee if the President wears Khaki wardi (Gen. Tauqeer Zia)
- Is the brother of Prime Minister’s right hand or as we say in Urdu Chamcha no. 1 (Mujeeb ur Rehman brother of infamous PMLN worker Saif ur Rehman, this guy also changed the famous logo of Pak Cricket in his tenure)
- Is related to a Govt. official or minister (Ijaz Butt is related to Minister Ahmed Mukhtar)
For the past many years we have seen people with little or no experience in this field heading the national cricket board. Every month millions of tax payer money is spend on their perks and salaries but from their actions it seems that they are not holding a public office but are the Maharaja of Pakistani cricket. Since ‘92 world cup win none of our test cricketer has been given the due credit or farewell that they deserved. Whether it’s Waseem Akram or Inzamam Ul Haq we have humiliated our cricketing legends and forced them out of International cricket. And who decides all this?
People like Ejaz Butt, who since the beginning of his dark tenure brought innumerous controversies and bans on Pak cricket.
Or People like Naseem Ashraf who on one occasion demanded millions from speed star Shoaib Akhtar on allegations that he failed to produce in the court of law. Naseem departed or ran off as soon as Musharaf resigned from his office.
Or people like Retired General Tauqeer Zia who along with his other shenanigans, once blatantly selected his own talent less son (Junaid Zia) in the national team and that also in a cricket loving country, where hundreds of aspiring young cricketers overlook education or a stable career just to represent the national team once in their life time.
When will we put an end to all this? When will we value merit over personal preferences? Has cricket become a forsaken commodity?
Believe it or not Hockey still is our national sports or that’s what is printed on every Pakistan studies text book they teach in schools these days. We came 12th in the ongoing hockey world cup, this is how low we can get when it comes to setting records. Are we signing up for a new record in the upcoming Cricket World Cup? Think about it!
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